Embracing Uncertainty - Nurturing Friendship and Peace in Troubled Times

"Embracing Uncertainty: Nurturing FriendshipPeace in Troubled Times" TRANSCRIPT Fawn: [00:00:00] Okay, welcome back to our friendly world. Let's make it a friendly world, even though the outside world may not seem MATT: that way. The outside world seems a little divided, yes. Guys, Fawn: calm down, everybody. Relax. Not that you guys aren't relaxed, our listeners, our friends out there. Thank you so much, by the way, everyone. Alright, here are the messages that came to me this week. Are you ready? MATT: Ruh roh. Fawn: First. Okay. Full discro disclo DISCLOSURE! Yes, I speak for a living. Anyway, full disclosure. Okay, I'll admit, um, so Should I say, Matt, that I look into cards and stuff? That I I get messages? Okay, I'm just a little bit psychic. I always have been. From ever since I can remember. I can remember things from when I was in diapers. But anyway, um, and a little bit before. And before, [00:01:00] actually. Not even a little bit. Anywho So, um, the week was really difficult, you guys. Difficult. Um Easy MATT: breezy. Fawn: I don't know if you all have been feeling this. And, and I know, um, this Like, we recorded different times, so things are different at different times. And the time has passed, and I can't even talk today. Time has passed. A little bit, since we've recorded this. I'm sure by the time it actually gets aired. But, um, so I was looking through for guidance. I was meditating, I was trying to go within, I was trying to get quiet. There was a lot, I was feeling a lot. And you all know this about me, like I tend to feel things before they happen. So, I pulled my trusty cards out. I have like many decks. So, I did a, I was like, okay, please show me what's going on. [00:02:00] Tell me give me a sign about an inkling about what I'm dealing with here and the card that kept coming up was Caution is warranted. Don't don't don't like seriously. It's like I I really dislike this card It just it's look deeper into the situation before Caution is warranted look deeper into the situation before Proceeding further and this card always scares me. I'm like, what is happening? What so what about it? What about it and you are my witness and the kids are are my witness because I kept doing it over and over again I told you to stop Well, I kept asking well what in what what are you referencing about like in reference to what is it this this this? What is it? I swear to you. I would shuffle all the cards over and over again Perfectly well, and then literally one card would always jump out [00:03:00] Jump out onto the desk like it would fly out. Guess what card it was every time the same card It happened five times in a row. MATT: I thought it was only three. Fawn: It was five. I did two other times. Why did you? Well, I'll tell you why I'll tell you why I did it one one more time because I'm like this is absurd and it happened again and this time That time I just kept my mouth shut. But I did it again this morning, right before our podcast and. Here's what happened this time though. So these, these things came up. Patience. Because I, I did some digging. I did some searching. And I realized, not only from these cards, by the way, but the world is always giving you, messages. The world is always showing you things. Be open and have confidence enough to know that it is indeed a message for you. You have to be level headed about [00:04:00] it, because then you'll find all kinds of crazy stuff, and it's not all meant for you. But, you know, in your core, you have a very calm feeling when it happens. Not that it's a happy, calm feeling every time, but there's a certain stillness about it that you know, okay. This is definitely from a higher source. You know what I'm saying? Rather than some trickster coming in to like say You know what I'm saying? So anyway, so I looked into the situation and not only that but I started to have these weird Dreams and I'm like, what is this about? And as soon as I tell someone like you Matt the dreams as I'm describing you the dream I'm like, please help me figure this out. What does this mean? As you're about to say it, I don't know, I'm like, As I'm saying it out loud, it makes sense to me, like, okay. You rubber duck it, MATT: I get it. What Fawn: do you mean rubber duck it? MATT: Programming thing, but if you wanna explain, like [00:05:00] sometimes it helps to speak to a rubber duck. Mm. Like talk to a rubber duck and explain what you're doing to the rubber duck just to make sure it makes sense. Sometimes you rub actually rubber duck with real people and you tell them I'm rubber ducking with you. Mm-Hmm. . And sometimes you literally just do it to a rubber duck. Fawn: Well, I noticed. Go ahead and MATT: Google it folks. Don't believe me. Fawn: Rubber duck MATT: rubber ducking. Well, Fawn: yeah, it, it totally works because as you're explaining it, you're Mm-Hmm, , you're understanding what it's, that's point. Wow, I didn't know that babe. Is that a computer term? That's a MATT: computer term. Yes, rubber ducking. That's a very technical term Fawn: Rubber ducky, you're the one Uh uh, careful, careful, careful Sesame Street, MATT: they got big IP lawyers Oh my gosh, okay We're sorry, we love you Sesame Street Fawn: Music rights, okay So, here are the messages that came up Once I acknowledged and understood What was happening, for real Like, looked deeper into the situation Was that first scary card? So it said patience. Now is the [00:06:00] time to learn, study, and gather information. Enjoy being a student because in the future you will synthesize your knowledge into action. Alright, and I'm like, and then these other cards popped up too, like they wanted to be heard. And then this one came up, it said, your desired outcome will occur in the very near future. Have patience and faith. So again, patience. I'm like, okay, that's related for sure. Because every time I pick the cards, I'm like, are you for real? But it's true and it said, okay, so have patience and faith and don't try to force it to happen. There are a lot of things I'm trying to force right now because I'm feeling, I'm feeling urgency and it's not just me. The world is feeling urgency. Everyone, MATT: well, the world is definitely speeding up again. Fawn: So many people I'm talking to, everyone So many people, I won't say everyone, but I do feel like it's everyone, feels so tense and scared [00:07:00] and just on edge. we really, the reason why I'm doing the podcast today, Matt didn't know, Matt's like, let's just do it. We're just winging it today, guys, because we're just so emotionally charged, we're like, let's just come in without any agenda, but talk about the messages this week, which is this, patience. Um, I'll tell you the other messages in a second, but, um, I forgot what I was saying. What am I saying? It just feels like it's very easy for fights to spark. MATT: And everybody's looking for a fight. Fawn: Everyone is looking for a fight, even though they don't realize it. Everyone's looking for a fight right now. MATT: Because, honestly, I think it's because everybody really wants to be right right now. They want to be correct. They want to be standing on the side of righteousness. You know, and everybody, I think, always wants to be in that spot. But I think it's gotten especially heated now. And it's going to continue for a few months. Fawn: Oh [00:08:00] my gosh. Okay, not only that, I'll add to that what you just said, and I'll add that there's so much pressure building inside of people that unless you work out, unless you do martial arts, or unless, unless you do something creative where you let out the steam, I think, like, we, we came across this idea when we were doing martial arts that we understood that touch is very important, and that, you know, People who abuse have been abused themselves, and they use that violent act as a means of communication because they know nothing else. So, hitting someone is a form of connection to another person. It is incredibly distorted and horrible. MATT: Right. Fawn: But at the root of it, that's probably why. Right? Yes. If someone is MATT: so desperate to communicate with you that they feel like you're not listening or you're [00:09:00] not participating and they're so desperate that they strike you, that's somebody who's desperately, really, really desperately wants to connect. Fawn: So Not that MATT: you should let them, not that you should, not that that's okay, not that I'm billing other things. It's Fawn: not okay. MATT: But that That is the level of frustration they have come to now. That's not your fault. You can, you don't have to accept delivery of anything from anybody. Fawn: Absolutely not. Absolutely not. However, this is planet Earth and it seems like that exists on the planet. Right. It's that kind of behavior, unfortunately, but we can shift that with people like you listening and, the messages that we're trying to get out in our own little way. But what I was going to say is that. When you're feeling pressure on the inside, fighting or yelling can release that pressure from your heart, unfortunately, like that's one, that's one way to get it out and release, right? And I think that's another reason [00:10:00] why people want to fight. It's just like, you don't know what to do with all this energy that's built up inside you. MATT: Right. Fawn: Therefore, the message of patience, the message of have patience, have faith, and don't try to force it. And then, The third card that jumped up was, , It's about taking care of yourself. And when you take care of yourself, everyone else benefits. Like, make sure you find a way to relax. Make sure you find a way to relax today. , whatever that is for you. If you're lucky enough to be able to get a massage somewhere, or maybe take a salt bath, take care of your nails, whatever it is, take care of yourself. I just think, this week, or Especially the last two weeks, actually. It's prime time for comfort, hygge, carbs, ice cream. Whatever, whatever does the trick for you to calm you down. MATT: Right. Fawn: You know, sometimes [00:11:00] It's in Ayurvedic, medicine, sometimes you need to eat potato chips because your body needs to get balanced that way. You need that amount of fat. You are in desperate need of it. MATT: Right. Fawn: Like sometimes when I have a really bad headache, I was told to like, have some potato chips. It totally worked. Like, I was off balance. That's the Vata Kapha, the Pitta Vata Kapha. Anyway, so another card that came up was, spending time alone in nature, meditating about your desires and intentions, ask, ask for help. Gain a positive perspective, you know, ask for angels or a higher source for a better perspective So these cards came up. I'm like, okay. Thank you. I understand and then guess what card came up right after the death card No No, I don't do those cards but My friend [00:12:00] the card came up about caution is warranted look deeper into the situation before proceeding further but this but this time It was so gentle the way it came up and it made me realize this is what it was talking about. So I felt like, okay, I'm on a better track, with everything that I thought about this week. Like, where is this coming from? Why did this happen? Why did this person react this way to me? Is this friendship over? Another friendship? Is it over? Perhaps. Fine. But the card came up again and this time I felt like okay this this was what it was talking about So anyway, so the message is please have patience take care of yourself. Don't try to force anything right now Just take it easy guys And the more we do this, I think it'll help the outside world or people around us or even the nature around us Also, we'll have that kind of patience and [00:13:00] gentleness, and that will spread. Also another sign I got was, I feel like I've had to take charge of so many things, where we're really, major experts. So, Are supposed to know what they're saying and I found that these major experts have made so many mistakes MATT: I've been feeling quite let down myself, Fawn: right? So taking things into your own Taking charge of things MATT: like where are the wise people? Fawn: They're everyone's freaking out Matt, MATT: I guess Fawn: I mean we had to go For one of our kids. We took one of our kids to a psychiatrist guys Okay, for all these tests and see, to see what's going on and her report comes back and it was inaccurate. There were inaccuracies in there and yes, I'm upset. This is supposed to be a professional and they can give your kid some crazy chemicals that will forever change [00:14:00] their chemistry. So if you're not writing down like facts, like if you've made mistakes on this report, how can I trust you to give my kids? Some crazy drugs. Not one, more. So anyway, I had to take leadership in that. And then went to another place, and I saw another mistake. And I'm like, oh my god. And I had to, I had to be calm about it. I couldn't fight, I couldn't raise ruckus. There are tiny things that could lead to big things, thank goodness. I'm knocking on wood Thank goodness. None of this is really like severe or like totally Dangerous stuff. I'm just catching little things and that's that's what we always say is pay attention to trifles trifles MATT: Pay attention to everything. But yeah Fawn: small things. MATT: Absolutely. I was going through similar stuff this week at work I mean, I'm working on this really big Dirt simple algorithm, right? [00:15:00] No problem. Piece of cake. Nah, bug here. Oh, okay. Let me fix that Bug here. Let me fix that now. I'm like, oh, it's rock solid. No problem And I'm like, no, it's probably another bug in there, but it was just we have you have to move forward Absolutely. Yes, you need to make progress going forward, but you need to watch yourself and make sure you're not traveling too fast Mm hmm Otherwise, for me, potentially embarrassing, but , for other people, it could be potentially life altering in a very negative way. Fawn: Exactly. And paying attention to the little things. will stop the big boulders from coming at you. If you can find the little pebbles of things that need attention, that keeps the big boulders from destroying you. Correct? MATT: Yes. They say if you do the little things well, the big things will tend to themselves. Fawn: Thank you. So, another [00:16:00] example. The last week, week and a half. I found a little thing on my tooth. In the, way back. And you know I have a total fear of going to the dentist. if I see, , an x ray, I feel like I'm gonna faint. I can't, like, such fear, because I've had such, whatever, it's my past history as a kid. I have a reason to be fearful of the dentist. Anyway, so, just, um, um, I made myself go. I called them up. I'm like, um, can I come in? I noticed a little dot, , and can you just take a look at it, please? Two signs came up. Okay. So I'm waiting for a call back, but I was at work. I was, I was recording. Fawn: I was doing an audition. And then a call comes in and I realized, Oh no, my phone was on. And so I stopped the recording. I, I, I pick up the phone and in my sound booth, I don't get great reception. I can hear people, but they, I go in and out with other people. [00:17:00] So Amy from, you know, the, the manager, I think she's the management, um, at the, at our dentist's office. She was like, Fawn. Yeah. You can come in. I love her by the way. So much. Hi, Amy. And she's like, yeah, come in and I was like, yeah, but I'm worried about insurance if I come in on my own volition. Am I still covered? She's like what I can't hear you. Hey, so i'm like can I still come in even though i'm coming in on my own? Dang, don't yell girl And she's like what and i'm like can I? am I Still covered on her and like and we're yelling at each other MATT: You need to FaceTime in ASL, I think. Fawn: It was just over the phone. And what was happening was when I was recording, I was actually, um, on with a meeting with, with my voiceover crew. And so, um, and I was just thinking to myself, I hope they don't [00:18:00] think I'm a fraud. Cause we were having such a beautiful meeting. You know, we were doing our voices and stuff. I'm like, I hope they don't think I'm a fraud. Like this is my genuine heart. You know and this comes from fear because in the past people were like, oh, she's so fake You know She's not really like that and it really hurts my feelings So that thought came into my head and then Amy called and then here we are yelling at each other I'm like, I don't want to come in if insurance doesn't cover me She's like, you're fine. You're fine. I'm like, and then I had to go cause I'm still on call with them. I have, I was on mute with them and trying to figure things out. I'm like, okay, okay. I'll just see you there. Bye. And then she texts me back right away and I don't have the text in front of me, but it's like she read my mind. She goes, by the way, Fawn, she basically sent me a message saying how uplifting my energy is or something like that. And how she loves me. Like, she, she thinks, she, I don't know, she said something so nice [00:19:00] about my natural way of communicating, and like, no matter what, like, I'm always pretty, like, positive, and like, happy, loving energy. Gee, they don't say that MATT: to me, I think they just put up with me. Fawn: Well, I talk to them a lot about life, when I go in there. Um, when my, my, my mouth is not open. I'm stuffing it. So anyway, but like I totally needed that message from her from anyone, you know Like immediately that message came through like right. No, you're like you're the real deal kind of a situation Mm MATT: hmm. Fawn: The second one was and this goes back to what we're talking about for this week. So I go in the office I open the door And Amy's across the way. She's like fun like Amy You And then she comes over and she's like, you know, I heard from, one of the people in the office who always takes care of me. She's like, she just told me you guys [00:20:00] have a podcast. I'm listening to it right now. I'm like, what? Why do you say ooh like that? MATT: It's always weird. Thank goodness we haven't been recognized out there in the world. I Fawn: have. I was recognized, yes, in Colorado. Oh, sniggities. Oh, yeah. I was recognized by someone who was like, I don't need more friends. I don't understand why you're doing this whole pod. I don't need any friends. I'm like, okay MATT: Good for you Fawn: Wow Anyway, um, so what she said was I really appreciate the podcast. I think is what she was saying, but she said yeah, because Friendship is so difficult MATT: It Fawn: is But she wasn't saying finding friends is difficult. I think what she was saying was It's hard to be friends MATT: it can be for sure. Fawn: Oh my goodness But isn't that my week the past week and a half, MATT: right? Fawn: And I gotta say I almost wanted to say this morning that on today's [00:21:00] podcast Maybe I'm done with making friends too. I understand I Understand look I'm just saying this is how I felt. I said, maybe this is how I was feeling. It's not What I'm going to do, but I understand those people that say I don't want any more friends, MATT: right? Fawn: Because it is heartbreaking you put yourself out there. You're friends with someone you think you're besties You're sharing so much right there will inevitably come a time when you have a riff It happens it does it happens with us as a married couple. We fight all the time guys. We do Matt, Matt's making a face. MATT: I'm always right, but yes, we do. Uh oh, it's going to be one right after the show. Anyway, no. Maybe we'll do a post show. Fawn: I'm, I'm, I'm tired. I'm tired. I have nothing in me anymore. I'm pretty tired right now too, so. I don't want any more fights, man. Okay. I'm teetered. Friendship, MATT: friendship is, friendship is [00:22:00] top. All friendships, I think, invariably, you end up in some semblance of conflict. You do. It's just mother nature. And when Fawn: you do, it's horrible. MATT: It's really hard to avoid. I mean, you literally have to just Either have completely a superficial friendship and acquaintance, or you have to make the conscious effort to not talk about the stuff that y'all are gonna, like, get into it about. Fawn: See, you're good at doing that. I refuse to not talk about things that are terrible. You know what I'm saying? Like, things that you fundamentally disagree on? I think, MATT: I think there's a probing that happens, and then once, you get a sense for where the other person's standing, you know, both sides recoil. But, with mutual respect, you can work through it. But Fawn: when one side does not recoil MATT: Yes, that is true. Fawn: That happened to me this week. MATT: Right. Fawn: Because I've been biting my lip. I've been very open to what my friend says. Mm hmm. Very open. Even though at times I'm like, Mmm, I totally disagree. [00:23:00] But, obviously there's something I need to learn or maybe understand. So I'm just gonna be quiet and listen. Right. Lovingly. Totally lovingly. Until I reach the point I'm like, No. No. And I was respectfully saying no, I think I was pretty respectful, in talking about my own case in particular, not about anyone else. And the person stopped calling. It's hard, guys. It is hard. Like Amy said, friendshipping is really hard. Friendship is MATT: really hard. You really have to have a very clean sense of, of everything. Fawn: It's devastating when a friendship breaks up. We've talked about this before. We've done a show on it. MATT: Yes. Fawn: I guess it's like owning a pet. I'm afraid to have a pet, because I don't want the pet getting sick and dying, because I'm already so concerned about everyone in this family, and like, not sleeping, and worrying about everybody. If I bring one other thing into it, I'm going to be Nuts. I'm going to [00:24:00] run down the street naked and be screaming like, like, I, I don't know. So some people don't have pets because they're afraid of the pet dying. You know, some people don't want to have friends because they don't want to get into a conflict, they don't want the heartbreak and I get it MATT: and also With friends you show them who you really are and if they reject you. Fawn: Ouch. Oh so painful It's as painful as a lover cheating on you and you know breaking up with you, right? It's the same gross feeling. It's a gross feeling is all I can say. It's gross You feel slimed That's my phone. I'm sorry. I forgot to turn it off. You just feel slimed, right? MATT: Yes. Fawn: Anyway, so, the message again. Have some patience. Take care of yourself. Caution MATT: and faith. Fawn: Yes, have faith. Don't try to force anything to happen. We're riding a wave of [00:25:00] major turmoil all around the world. MATT: All around the world. Fawn: I mean, come on. I don't have to tell you everything that's happening and everything that everyone is feeling. I think we're all feeling it. So create your own sanctuary and Going once again, I always bring this up you guys, but Remember I love Martha Stewart. I do. But like, remember after 9 11, she was interviewed and someone asked her, what should we do, Martha Stewart? She goes, well, no matter what's happening on the outside world, what you can do is bring in something beautiful, bring it into your immediate surroundings. If you can find a flower, put it in a vase and put it on the table that you're sitting at. Bring some beauty into your life, like something so small that you can appreciate, appreciate some beauty, surround yourself with beauty, make your surroundings as beautiful as possible, the kind of beautiful that you [00:26:00] love. MATT: And there you go, I mean, in point of fact, I hadn't realized how, how sad maybe, I don't know, um, I went for a ride. My first quasi serious ride hour and a half today on my bike. I went north, dun, dun, dun. And I went for 45 out, 45 back. Life is simple. Life is good. Oh my God. Do I feel good today? I feel like I've accomplished. So now. It's Miller time So that's my surround yourself with beauty because oh my god, there was this magnolia tree. Oh, it's so pretty. I Fawn: love Oh my goodness, oh MATT: and it was and they were blossomed they were little buds They were still all nice and curled up because it was cold, but I Fawn: love how they bud like that It looks like someone holding their fingers together like offering you a a jewel like here you go And MATT: that was just zoom one. Fawn: Yeah, MATT: that was just one thing. I passed Fawn: right Keep [00:27:00] looking out for beauty and then you find more of it, what you focus on, kind of thing. Yes. so, I think that's it. I'm sure as soon as I stop recording I'm like, oh, but, you know, you'll say the same thing, Matt. I hope that makes sense. MATT: Faith. Fawn: Patience. Taking care of yourself. caution. No, I mean, that's scary, honey. And, this is about the art of friendship, right? But it's very important. And very good to spend time alone. Sometimes you need all the voices, all the noise, away from you, so you can center. So it's good to spend time alone, in nature, meditating, thinking about what you want, what you intend, what your intentions are, and, while you're doing that, just asking for it to show up for you. Asking for some help. Don't worry about who, don't worry about how it's going to happen. Just say, [00:28:00] please send me help about this, ? And that will give us a more positive perspective and create a ripple effect of more calm and safety and love. And hopefully that'll spread all over the place. that's it for me. Is that it from you for now, Matt? Yes. Okay. We love you. Thank you for listening. Have a beautiful every day. Talk to you in just a few days and once again, if you need us before that, reach out , okay? Through the website. Goes to our email. MATT: Be well.