Episode Transcript
Changing Our Narratives to Have A More Fulfilling Life and Relationships TRANSCRIPT
[00:00:00] FAWN: Guess who's here? Everyone, our beautiful friend Dr. Walters is back. Yay, Dr. C. We call her Dr. Cathia Walters is back. You can reach her at walterswellnessgroup.com. Last time we were talking about radical acceptance, you remember? If you don't go back and listen to it, because this is a continuation.
[00:00:23] FAWN: And today, today we're speaking about shifting our narratives, the stories we tell. These are the stories we tell others amongst each other. These are the stories that we even tell to ourselves. So of course, Let me look it up. I already looked it up, actually. Are you ready? Why are you looking at me like that, Matt?
[00:00:42] FAWN: No, no, go ahead. Go ahead.
[00:00:43] DR. WALTERS: That what?
[00:00:44] MATT: What happened shifting has a very interesting British connotation.
[00:00:47] FAWN: You know what? Oh, wow. I didn't, and by the way, that is Matt's thug name. We all have thug names for each other in our family.
[00:00:57] DR. WALTERS: Thug names?
[00:00:58] FAWN: Yes, like gangster
[00:00:59] MATT: names, and mine is shifty because I know how to drive a stick shift.
[00:01:04] FAWN: Wow. Hey, like Dr. C and friends out there, one of our friends actually started this, to snap each other out of bad moods or like funks. We may be in, we would kidnap each other. So we would show up at each other's houses at like some god awful, like, God, like happy hour, which is like super early in the morning and just kidnap the person.
[00:01:27] FAWN: They're not allowed to change their clothes, comb their hair, nothing. And then we take them on an adventure to have fun, like as is. And so, and so, my friends did this to me first, and so my other friend. Like, they made me relax cuz I couldn't relax and they had a foot spa out. They made me put my feet into the water, put your feet in
there.
[00:01:51] MATT: God dang it, you're gonna
[00:01:52] FAWN: relax. And our friend Claude goes like, you know that the stereotypical from the old movies, we, he goes, we have ways to make you relax, see, you know, like the gangster talk. And so we would start laughing. And so Matt and I kind of took off from that. And so I became knuckles because I was cross-training in martial arts and I was obsessed with my knuckles.
[00:02:17] FAWN: I have really sharp knuckles, so my thug name is, Knuckles. Our baby girl, our first baby girl, when she was born, we named her giggles because it seemed like giggles, because, and it's, it's like the names that are so, innocent, but if you look at it, or if you really think about it, it could be very scary.
[00:02:38] FAWN: So giggles, like, if you can imagine someone who has you in a room and they're interrogating you and they're like, bring in giggles, you know, it's not gonna be fun. Like, it's not gonna be about like happy, happy giggles, but giggles. Because as a baby, like if we stubbed our toe and we're like, ow, she would start giggling.
[00:03:01] FAWN: She giggled what, what seemed to be at pain? Right? Right. At someone else's pain. Like it was funny. And it's
[00:03:09] MATT: just how she will react to emotions
[00:03:12] FAWN: sometimes, right? Yeah. I'm like this too and very inappropriate times. I'll start laughing. Like, giggling anxiety, is that, what is that about Dr.
[00:03:23] FAWN: C?
[00:03:23] DR. WALTERS: Yeah. Oftentimes when we get anxious mm-hmm. That's how we deal with it, is we giggle in the most and people look at you and it's like, that's how we deal with, or discomfort. Mm-hmm. Right. So we'll screw Right. And that's our way of kind of calming ourselves down because something feels uncomfortable.
[00:03:43] DR. WALTERS: And so we're grounding ourselves that way. Hmm.
[00:03:46] FAWN: Wow. So it's not, it's nothing bad. It's actually a good thing
[00:03:51] DR. WALTERS: cuz you're, it's not a bad thing, it's just the way of coping. Right. We all cope with discomfort in different ways. Right. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. Some of us will physic be physical, others just be, oh, this doesn't feel good and I don't know what to do in this moment.
[00:04:08] DR. WALTERS: And so I'll chuckle, I'll giggle.
[00:04:11] FAWN: That makes a lot of sense because in yoga, there are certain mantras. Mantras like words, sounds, affect the body, the physical, the spirit, all levels. But if you repeat ha as a mantra, like hahahahaha ha is a healing. Yeah, it's a healing vibration. Yes. So that, that makes sense why the giggling would come in when there's discomfort.
[00:04:37] FAWN: Mm-hmm. Thank you. So, but the subject today is different. Is it different? I don't know. Everything is related, right?
[00:04:43] DR. WALTERS: Everything is related. Okay. Everything is related. So
[00:04:46] FAWN: can I read to you what I I, my notes on narrative before we get into it? Sure. Okay. Please do. So. Ooh, I'm getting hot. I just put on my glasses and when I do, it gets all foggy in here.
[00:04:58] FAWN: Okay. Narrative. Okay. It comes in many forms, you guys, we have both nonfiction, like memoirs, biographies. News reports, documentaries, travel logs, et cetera. We also have narrative that is fictional, like fairy tales, fables, legends, thrillers, novels. You get the point. So the word narrative comes from the Latin verb.
[00:05:30] FAWN: I'm gonna mispronounce it so I'm just gonna spell it. N A R R A R e, nare. Maybe I don't speak Latin, which means to tell Nare to tell, which is derived from the adjective. I'm gonna spell the word. G n a r u s, the root. G n o: no, it means to know. It's a knowing or being skilled. There is, if you think about it, narrative,
[00:06:07] FAWN: There is narrative all around us in life. We have oral storytelling. And it's possibly the earliest form of sharing, like the sharing of narrative is the oral storytelling. I mean, I think so it could have been with, I mean if, if I think about it was did language come first or did art come first?
[00:06:27] FAWN: Like art as in drawing or maybe sign language. I don't know. So possibly the earliest form of sharing narrative could be oral storytelling we're continuously shaped by narratives. This is how we create our lives, is through narrative, speeches, literature, theater, music, song, poetry.
[00:06:51] FAWN: Comics, journalism, movies, television, animation, photography, video games, radio, painting, sculpting, drawing, fashion, how we dress, how we style our hair. I mean I can keep going and I was thinking about it. A narrative is a telling of some true or fictitious events. Or they could be like connected sequence of events.there's also a personal narrative, and a personal narrative is a story or a prose narrative it's basically our ordinary language we use in speaking or writing. And that's interesting cuz that's how we probably speak to ourselves is just ordinary language. And it is, our personal experience is a personal narrative.
[00:07:44] FAWN: And so, you know, we were, Matt and I were just Dr. Z like yesterday, we were with a friend another mom friend, and we were talking as moms, as women about the personal narrative that we have within ourselves that is completely different than how we talk to someone else. We would never tell someone the things that we tell ourselves.
[00:08:08] FAWN: Mm-hmm. Like, you're not good enough, you're ugly. You're, you're, your body looks terrible. You are not good enough. This is terrible. You're not talented, you're not doing enough. It's constant for us moms. I've been talking to a lot of my female friends, especially lately, and for some reason it's becoming more of an issue.
[00:08:27] FAWN: This narrative is getting louder and so I've just been making an effort to make sure that we're all talking and it's usually me crying so I can at least open up and show my friends hey, I'm just gonna open up to you and maybe you'll do it too. And it, it works because I'll just say the thoughts that are going through my head, what I'm struggling with.
[00:08:50] FAWN: Mm-hmm. Because it is a struggle. And when you don't feel good, it affects your relationships, because you can always tell when someone is insincere. If you're going through it, chances are someone that you're nearby is going through the same thing. Mm-hmm. Because I feel like we're so interconnected like that.
[00:09:07] FAWN: I always say that. Anyway, so that's my interpretation of ne narrative and shifting our narratives is key. Like we were amongst our friends. We were saying, okay, we gotta stop it. when in our heads we're saying, Ooh, you're ugly to yourself. Well, that's what we say to ourselves as mo as like women, right?
[00:09:28] FAWN: You're, you're too fat, you're too skinny, whatever. To shift it and go, oh dear one, I'm sorry. The brain is having some issues right now. That is not true. It's saying things that are simply not true and even if we don't believe that, but just to have a different narrative makes the brain think differently, I feel like.
[00:09:49] FAWN: That's it. That's my, that's my take. I'm gonna turn it over to you guys.
[00:09:53] MATT: Well, first for our British friends, I wanna say shifting is literally like selling. So I'm gonna shift a lot of t-shirts at the concert, means I'm gonna sell a lot of tick. I'm selling a lot of t-shirts at the concerts. So it's an interesting kind of take on it, you know, a little shift as far as, it's almost like you're maybe gonna sell yourself something.
[00:10:16] MATT: Mm-hmm. And to me, a narrative is never a fictitious thing. It's a truth. Well, it could be, be both, but the narrator always tells the truth. Maybe it's inside of the story. You know that the film is, or whatever it is, or the play or whatever, but thenar. Narrator's always there to kind of give you that omniscient view that kind of, this is how things really are.
[00:10:39] MATT: Which is the fun part.
[00:10:41] FAWN: Well, what I was saying was in the definition is there are many kinds of narration. Mm-hmm. There's fictitious, there's, there's fiction and nonfiction. I mean, if you look it up, it has like pages and pages of notes of like what narration actually is. It's fascinating,
[00:10:57] MATT: right? But I think traditionally the narrator has the role of the being the truth teller inside of the
[00:11:03] FAWN: box.
[00:11:03] FAWN: But what if you have a shifty narrator? Shifty is an American shifty, like one that is not to be trusted. Right. Because they're selling a lie, huh.
[00:11:12] MATT: Well, and that's just it. You know, we oftentimes get sold. Tell ourselves lies. We oftentimes tell
[00:11:20] FAWN: ourselves, well, okay, here's my point. Yes, I'm sorry I'm interrupting.
[00:11:24] FAWN: But here's my point is, well, how can you tell what truth is? Maybe, maybe I do look like a 500 pound Shrek character. I don't know. Am I being vain saying I don't really look like that? Maybe I do. I don't know what is truth? How, how can you tell what the truth is? And I think that's life. Life is so creative that you can create anything, really.
[00:11:48] FAWN: Anything could be anything. Oh, truth is
[00:11:50] DR. WALTERS: truth. If someone wants that, truth is relative, right? Truth is relative and it's right. And it's based on our experience. One of the ways I think about that in terms of narrative, cuz I think there's validity, I think there's truth to both what both of you're saying in terms of what's a narrative, right?
[00:12:06] DR. WALTERS: Because there is the personal narrative. There is the pros. Right, and they're all based on the, or beliefs of ourselves. It's the belief of the world, and that is my truth, because it's based on my experience, right? So whatever's happening in my life, I'm going to create a story based on that. And that is my truth in that moment.
[00:12:34] DR. WALTERS: That is my truth. Can that change, can that shift? Of course, that can shift because then I have exposure to other things. I may learn something else, right? I may learn that there's different types of narratives, and in learning that my truth is probably gonna look different, my narrative is going to shift.
[00:12:56] DR. WALTERS: Right. So the way I think about narratives is I tell folks, I said, it's the story we tell ourselves based on what is happening, based on what has happened, right? Because we all have a history. We have our family of origins, right? So there's the family interjects, what we learn from those around us, including society, right?
[00:13:28] DR. WALTERS: That's our initial shape. Think babies, when we're infant, we learn from taste. We learn from touch. We learn that something is hot by touching it. And so we create a story around something that looks red. Everything that's red is hot. And that's our narrative at that point, until we learn that it's not everything that's red,
[00:13:53] DR. WALTERS: if it's red and it gives off heat, it's probably gonna be hot. That's a different narrative.
[00:14:00] FAWN: And Dr. C, it would change from culture to culture. Like yesterday we were talking about we wanted to buy some flowers and the kids were like, oh, don't buy the white ones. That means death. I'm like, oh no, it doesn't mean death from where I come from.
[00:14:15] FAWN: We were talking about colors and what they mean to different cultures. So it, depends on where you're coming from too.
[00:14:22] DR. WALTERS: Absolutely. Absolutely. So it's, the what we see, what we hear, what we're told, what we're taught, right. And then we make meaning from that? That's the thing.
[00:14:35] DR. WALTERS: So when we think narrative, there's that initial based on everything you just said, culture person, or family society. And we're taught that. And then at some point, and this is how when we're talking about shifting the narratives, at some point we start making certain decisions and we're like, uh, this does not serve me well.
[00:14:59] DR. WALTERS: Even if it's my family's belief, this does not serve me well. Even if it's a cultural belief, because it's about when I create this storyline, how do I see myself in it? What am I telling myself? And if I'm telling myself based on this narrative that I'm not good enough, right?
[00:15:23] DR. WALTERS: Then I'm going to start walking through the world as if I'm not good enough. So it starts to affect my self-esteem. It starts to affect my self-worth, right? And ultimately, the respect I then have for myself or the respect I ask you to show me. So those are the things to think about is like, again, when I think narrative, I think, okay, something triggered me.
[00:15:50] DR. WALTERS: It could be thought I have, it could be something, someone sad. Mm-hmm. It could be something someone did or didn't do or didn't say. A trigger could be internal or it could be external. In the moment I'm triggered, I will create a story. And my story could be the thought that, oh my God, Fawn thinks I am, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
[00:16:19] DR. WALTERS: Right? Fawn thinks I'm not good enough, Matt thinks I'm whatever. And based on that thought that I've come up with, right. The way the brain then works, it's going to look for evidence to support that thought that I just had. Right? So guess what it's gonna do? It's gonna think about last week when my coworker said something and I'm like, see, they all think I'm stupid.
[00:16:50] DR. WALTERS: And then it's gonna go back to grad school when one of my professor made a correction on something that I did. Mm-hmm. Still got 90. Right. But he made a correction on one thing, but you didn't get that a hundred. But I did not get that 100. So here's another proof that I'm stupid, then I'm gonna go back to undergrad.
[00:17:10] DR. WALTERS: And one of, one of my, whether it was my classmate or one of the professors said something, there's evidance and then I'm gonna keep going back to high school, to eighth grade, to seventh grade, to kindergarten when my, drawing was not, the only one that was chosen as first price, right? And so the brain is gonna look for all these evidence.
[00:17:32] DR. WALTERS: So when we think narratives, when we're thinking they're oftentimes, so we're not talking about the positive stories right now, right? We're talking about the ones that are problematic. So we're talking about the negative narratives that we create, right? Right? And when I have these negative narratives, they're typically not grounded in factual evidence, They're typically catastrophic, they're negative, they're judgmental, And so because I'm creating these negative stories, it's gonna start affecting what I do so behaviorally, because if I think people think I'm stupid, guess what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna do one of two things. I'm gonna go inwards because I feel shame.
[00:18:16] DR. WALTERS: Right. And so I'm gonna shut down. Right. I'm gonna disappear, or I'm gonna go outward and I'm gonna be very grandiose. Right. You all suck, I da, da, da. Right. So I can go inward or outward. Right. Right. Because that's the thing is like, you know, I'm either gonna beat myself up or I'm gonna beat you up.
[00:18:37] DR. WALTERS: That's bullying. Right,
[00:18:39] MATT: right. Because you're being, you feel like you're bull getting bullied.
[00:18:43] DR. WALTERS: Exactly. Exactly. By your narratives. So behaviorally, I'm gonna do some things, and that's one of the things I'm gonna do. Right? Okay. Emotionally, I'm gonna feel like crap. So, emotionally, I'm gonna be sad. I'm gonna be withdrawn, I'm gonna be depressed, I'm gonna be irritable, I'm gonna be angry.
[00:19:04] DR. WALTERS: Right. And when I'm feeling that way, so it becomes a cycle. So if we think about when we're talking about our narratives and how it plays out, and then how to shift those narratives, right? The first thing we have to understand is that we can't change something that we're not aware of and we can shift something that we're not accepting.
[00:19:22] DR. WALTERS: So I have to accept that I'm the one telling this story. Mm-hmm. Right? I'm the one creating this story. And my story right now is saying, you are these negative things and to Fawn's point. We're often very mean to ourselves, So when we're telling these stories, we're not seeing that I got 90, I'm seeing that I didn't get that 10 points
[00:19:47] MATT: right.
[00:19:47] MATT: Or you're, you're looking at the other student who did better than you did, and you're seeing, you're constantly going through and you're seeing your lack. You're seeing gaps. You're seeing issues and problems where perhaps there aren't any, you know, when we look back on our lives, it depends on our current state of mind, what we focus on.
[00:20:07] FAWN: Yes, absolutely. Why do we do that? Why Dr. C? Why do we do that?
[00:20:11] DR. WALTERS: So we fo you mean, why do we focus on the negatives?
[00:20:15] FAWN: Yes.
[00:20:16] DR. WALTERS: So a couple different reasons. But the primary reason, you know, as I see it, is we have internalized for so long, what we believe and who we believe we are. And so it becomes common practice.
[00:20:33] DR. WALTERS: So even sometimes when we're giving ourselves kudos, we do it in such a way that it really is negative, So for example, oh, suck it up. You know, you got this, suck it up. Get over it. Right? So we're telling ourselves in one way that we're okay, but the way we're doing it, we're triggering a different part of the brain that becomes defensive, right?
[00:21:02] DR. WALTERS: And because we do things based on habits, the stories we've been telling ourselves since childhood, right, is a coping mechanism. So even if it's negative, that's how we've coped and because that's how we've coped over time. Now, fast forward several years later, it becomes familiar. All right. I still don't
[00:21:26] FAWN: understand.
[00:21:26] FAWN: Like, why, why would that be a coping mechanism to be, to berate yourself to,
[00:21:34] MATT: to spiral yourself down. Right? Like even beat yourself up. I mean, that's ultimately speaking not healthy, but are you kind of excusing whatever's currently in your face, you know, like, oh, well, you know, I, I expected that to happen because of all this stuff that happened in the past.
[00:21:50] MATT: So if anything bad happens to you in the present, you immediately frame it as I deserved it. Or, or this is just what
[00:21:57] FAWN: happens to me. Or could it be maybe the people that you looked up to, like a parent, talked to you like that. So you associate exactly. You associate that with a loving. Um,
[00:22:09] DR. WALTERS: a loving narrative.
[00:22:10] DR. WALTERS: It's called schemas. It calls schemas, right? We have schemas. Schemas are the way we frame the world based on, you know, and, you know, I always hate to say this, but it really is about our experiences at an early age, right? So we all have fears. We have fears of abandonment. We have fears of rejection.
[00:22:35] DR. WALTERS: Those all comes out of either things that we've heard, right? So let's, let's use something that is very common to talk about or hear about. So if you grew up in a home that's abusive and you hear certain language and you were talked to a certain way, right? If you recall certain names, it becomes the norm, right?
[00:23:01] DR. WALTERS: So you start equating that with normalcy. Oh, it's normal to talk this way to myself or to have someone talk to me that way, because that's how they show love, right? So that's one way, right? The other way is, you know, if I have, if I speak my truth, the last time I spoke my truth as a kid, my parents got a divorce and it was all my fault, right?
[00:23:31] DR. WALTERS: So I should never be my authentic self. So the narratives that I'm gonna work with are narratives that are false, because I'm gonna say to myself, this is good. This is love, right? You can never be angry because if you're angry, people leave, right? And when you're angry, it means you're a bad person. So it's going to, what are my core beliefs that I have and where those come from oftentimes are very early, some are later, but more often than not, they're these fears that we develop at an early age about who I am and how I will survive in this world. Right.
[00:24:17] FAWN: Is that making sense? It is. And, and then I have questions.
[00:24:20] FAWN: Does it make sense to you, Matt Ab
[00:24:23] MATT: Absolutely. I come at it from a very different place though, cuz I always look for, you know, when I'm feeling in inferior, I look for a truly empirical, as it were, measurement of why and how and so, mm-hmm. You know, case in point when I'm feeling, uh, less than at work, I'll look at my resume and I'll be like, oh my God, you did this, this, this, this, and this.
[00:24:48] MATT: How can you possibly, you know, obviously something weird is happening in this particular situation and we need to figure out what that is and we need to address it. But I'm weird like that. Mm-hmm.
[00:24:57] DR. WALTERS: Well, I wouldn't say your word like that, Matt. I think what you are doing is kind of what this podcast is about is how do I shift my narrative, right?
[00:25:07] DR. WALTERS: Because what you've done is you've gone from, I'm thinking this, this negative thing, but I'm not gonna make it my reality. So how do I change that and make it something a different narrative? How do I make it a po more positive reality? Remember I said the negative narratives are usually, not factual, not grounded in reality, they're negative.
[00:25:34] DR. WALTERS: They're catastrophic, and they're judgmental. Right. And so when I have that narrative, I'm going to walk through the world a certain way. If I shift my narrative, and that's how we start to shift our narrative, is we, I have a model I teach it's the four Cs. I need to catch it. And I think this is what you're doing, Matt.
[00:25:56] DR. WALTERS: I need to catch what is my story right now? What am I telling myself right now? Then I need to check it. What evidence do I have that this is true? Right? And oftentimes, like I said, there really isn't a lot of evidence that this is true because I'm pulling out for these little things, right? And then I need to change it because I'm recognizing that I had a 90.
[00:26:25] DR. WALTERS: That's still an A. That doesn't mean I'm stupid. Clearly I did well. The thing is, when I change it, I need to change it with compassion. Because what we sometimes do is like going back to what I said earlier, fawn, when I was like, well, you know, we can change it, but we also change it in a way that's created another level of distress because I'm like, well suck it up.
[00:26:48] DR. WALTERS: You've got 90. Right? That feels very demeaning. Suck it up. Right, right. Even though it's intended to boost me, also gives the sense of there's something wrong with you. Get over it. So the other C is with compassion. So when I'm changing it with compassion, I'm saying, you know what you did well, I understand that you're upset because you didn't get a hundred or you didn't get nine to five.
[00:27:16] DR. WALTERS: But guess what? You know what? And here evidence that I'm good enough. I'm gonna dust off my resume, and I'm gonna look at all my accomplishments. I'm gonna look at all these things. So imagine shifting it to think about it and reframing it that way. I'm gonna feel different.
[00:27:35] DR. WALTERS: Because the whole idea of shifting our narratives, right? It's really about changing how I feel and subsequently what I'm doing. Because if I'm beating myself up, I am going to crawl in a hole, If I shift that narrative to make it a little more positive, I'm gonna sit up much taller, right? Did my grade change?
[00:28:00] DR. WALTERS: No. Right? But the, so it's about creating meaning. It's what meaning do I attach to the event. That's the bottom line. Because life is gonna happen. Like, we've said all the time, pain is inevitable. Suffering is a choice, So how I choose to deal with this, whatever, this is the story I choose to tell myself about this, whether it's my height, my weight, the color of my hair, my skin, my financial situation.
[00:28:34] DR. WALTERS: Whatever story I tell myself about this situation is gonna dictate how I feel. I,
[00:28:43] FAWN: okay, so is it okay if I ask a question right now? I didn't wanna interrupt,
[00:28:46] DR. WALTERS: please. Actually, I, no, actually, I welcome questions. I, I want this to be interactive, so please ask
[00:28:52] FAWN: away I'm making notes. And now I feel like maybe I'll take us into different directions. Can I just bring up two topics? Please do to. So don't answer me right away cuz there's another one after the first one. Okay. Okay. So when we were discussing about, perhaps it could, it could be rooted in people you loved or people who are responsible for you, like parents when you're babies, and hearing the narrative that's thrown at you.
[00:29:18] FAWN: And then incorporating that narrative as your inner dialogue, your inner narrative, mm-hmm. Your personal story. That's where things get developed. But I was thinking, well, how is it that when you have more than two kids in a family, that you can have a radically different kid who thinks differently?
[00:29:37] FAWN: And then I was thinking to myself, but it's usually the youngest kid who's most rebellious or doesn't go with the paradigm of the family or whatever you call it. Like they, they are rebels or they do things completely differently. Case in point, Matt, he's the youngest in his family. His family is so dear, radically different and also, oh dear.
[00:30:00] FAWN: And also me, I'm completely different than my family. And I wonder, and we we're both like the third children, right? The. The youngest. And I'm wondering, is it because we had the opportunity, and this will lead me to my second question, is it because we had the opportunity to kind of sit back and hear their narratives that they were telling each other, like the parents telling the oldest sibling or the parent telling the, the middle sibling and then the siblings, you know, the older siblings telling each other.
[00:30:37] FAWN: In a way, we kind of were quiet and we were listening to what was happening. So we had the opportunity to go, that's not right. So we think differently. So we had a different life. Mm-hmm. We didn't follow the same path they did. So that's my question is like, how do kids have kids that are born in the same family, like they could have radically different lives and radically different dialogues within themselves.
[00:31:02] FAWN: How does that happen? So is is my theory correct? And also that leads me to. For example, my friends, my all my, all my women friends who are moms. You guys talked about, okay, well I'm going to reflect on the job that I did. I'm gonna look at my resume, I'm gonna look at all these accomplishments that I've done.
[00:31:25] FAWN: I gotta tell you that as a mom, we don't have time for that because there's no time to reflect on the positives or what your wins even. There's no time to even think it feels like. So we go from one task to another, and that results in not being able to shift our narrative because we don't have the opportunity to even relax, to go, Hey, I just made a i, I, I did well, I taught my kids how to swim.
[00:31:53] FAWN: You know, we went, we went through all these hurdles, but that's not my narrative cuz I gotta rush home and do this, these other things that I always feel like I'm behind in cuz there's so much to do because
[00:32:04] MATT: ridiculous husband didn't make lunch.
[00:32:05] FAWN: Stop it. Don't blame yourself. I'm not, this is not about you.
[00:32:09] FAWN: I'm talking about not only I'm talking about my friend, I know I'm talking about in general what I feel like as the archetype of the mother in our society. Mm-hmm. Just don't, don't take it personally, Matt. My God, I, I wasn't but you said Yeah, I know. I said lots of things. But's still, you did not make
[00:32:30] MATT: lunch on the, but that is true.
[00:32:31] MATT: Exactly. Why didn't I?
[00:32:34] DR. WALTERS: But anyway, and I think, Matt, I think Matt, what you just did is you, and this is, this is a good example of kinda what we were talking about earlier is Fawn stated something and immediately. You went into your internal schemas, right? Because remember, schemas do one of two things. It perpetrates you know, perpetuate, negative stuff that we've internalized or it can be healing, right?
[00:32:58] DR. WALTERS: And you immediately, your story that you created in that moment was, it's me. It's my fault. I'm to be blamed, right? Which then connects to what my history is about how I saw myself growing up in my family, right? How I saw myself or how I see myself even now in the world, right? So I just wanted to point that out and then I wanna go ahead and address, your questions Fawn, but I think that was a good example of how when we feel triggered, cuz remember we operate often in the unconscious.
[00:33:33] DR. WALTERS: Mm-hmm. So sometimes we're triggered and we're not even recognizing that that's what's happening in the moment. Right. And we respond behaviorally, right? So when we're triggered, we go, we can go three places when we're triggered; thoughts by creating an immediately as a narrative feelings, I feel hurt, you know, betrayed sad, or I go to behavior.
[00:34:02] DR. WALTERS: So I can be triggered in any of these three areas initially, right? But they're all connected. Cuz I tell myself a story, I'm gonna have a feeling I'm gonna behave based on that feeling, which can trigger a different set of thoughts. That's the other thing I didn't say about the thoughts is that they're automatic.
[00:34:18] DR. WALTERS: That's why we keep building. It starts here and it gets bigger and bigger and bigger. I can go to thoughts or I can go back to a feeling with, goes to another thought and we create this kind of feedback loop. It's a cycle. Right. So to your points, fawn, and I'm gonna address the, the last one about moms, and please correct me if I got this wrong, but what I'm hearing you say is that because as mothers we are so busy creating , and showing up, you know, for kids, for families, that it becomes difficult to stop and be kind to ourselves,
[00:34:57] FAWN: to just stop and think about what you've done.
[00:35:00] FAWN: Like, hey, I, I did all these cool things today, but there's no time for that.
[00:35:07] DR. WALTERS: And so I'm, but I'm, I'm gonna actually push back on that because I think there is time. There's always time, right? And I think
[00:35:14] FAWN: that gives me stress. Dr. C
[00:35:16] MATT: I, I'm glad Dr. C said it. Not me. It's her honey. It's her,
[00:35:22] MATT: it's not, wasn't me.
[00:35:22] FAWN: What that, what I hear from you, Dr. C, is Oh, you lazy Fawn you see you're not making good use of your time. There's not enough time. You obviously have enough time. You're just not using, you're not, oh my goodness. You're not doing it. That's what I hearing. That's perfect
[00:35:36] DR. WALTERS: though, because that, oh my goodness.
[00:35:37] DR. WALTERS: See, that's it though. What's the narrative? That is the narrative, right? That is the narrative that you just came up with based on something I just said. That's exactly how it works, is someone will say something and immediately, I create in this situation form you created a story of what you heard or you internalized that I said that you're lazy
[00:36:02] DR. WALTERS: find time, da da da da. I never said that. You're not
[00:36:05] FAWN: doing it right is what I,
[00:36:07] DR. WALTERS: oh dear. You're not doing it. I never said that. Right, and so this goes exactly to my point in that when we have these narrative, these thoughts, they're negative, they're judgmental, they're catastrophic, and they're not grounded in any factual evidence.
[00:36:23] DR. WALTERS: Because I never said that. What I said was that I'm gonna push back cuz there is and always is time. We have to learn how to create that time, right? For a couple reasons, one, we have to break the cycle somehow because then what are we teaching our daughters that they're not important enough to make time for themselves or to give themselves credit where credit is due.
[00:36:54] DR. WALTERS: Oh my God. So what does that mean? That means that I don't have to necessarily stop in the middle of the day and say, yeah, look at what I did from nine to 12. I don't have to do that. I can choose a time of the day and it could be the end of the day, and I can do my gratitude journal. I don't always have to journal about all the horrible things that happened.
[00:37:19] DR. WALTERS: Doctor C, there's
[00:37:20] FAWN: no time to sit down and write in a journal. Oh dear. But what, what? I wanna push back on what you're saying. Doctor C is living in the moment. So while I am, let's just say teaching the kids how to swim and they're not drowning, I'm like, yay, look at us. Look at me. We, I'm teaching you how to swim.
[00:37:38] FAWN: You know what I mean? Exactly. So
[00:37:40] DR. WALTERS: in the moment you can do that. Okay. You can definitely do that.
[00:37:43] FAWN: Multitasking.
[00:37:44] DR. WALTERS: You can do that. Right. And how long did that take you to just say that sentence? That was less than
[00:37:50] FAWN: 30 seconds. That's why I'm saying it's multitasking because it's, as I'm doing it, um Right. Doing a victory dance as it's happening.
[00:37:59] FAWN: You
[00:38:00] DR. WALTERS: can do that. You can definitely do that. Right. And as for journaling, I brought that up because I think it's extremely important to reflect on our accomplishments. Right? And it doesn't mean write in 10 pages. It means at the end of the night, I can identify before I close my eyes, I can lay in the bed.
[00:38:20] DR. WALTERS: I don't even have to write it down right before I, I start snoring. Right? I can say, right, what's one thing I accomplished today? What's one thing that went well? What's one thing that I observed that went well? That was beautiful. That was good. I can do that.
[00:38:42] FAWN: It's like getting the gold stars. When we were in school, like kindergarten, did you get, mm-hmm.
[00:38:48] FAWN: Did you guys get those gold stars? Sometimes? They were red, lots of them. Oh, so we should give ourselves little Oh, oh, look at them. Lots
[00:38:55] DR. WALTERS: of them. Right, right, right. So, but no, those are the things. So when we're thinking about shifting or changing the, the narrative, right? It's the little things that makes a huge difference.
[00:39:08] DR. WALTERS: So in that moment, oh my goodness, they're swimming. I did that. That in of itself starts to shift the dynamic of, I don't have time. I'm lazy. I'm not good enough. I'm a poor teacher, whatever. Right? That little thing. Because if we think about it in terms of, again, how the brain works, it doesn't like change, right?
[00:39:35] DR. WALTERS: It likes routine. It likes things to be a certain way. Right. And so if I'm moving along this way, and I've been doing this for 30 years, right? That's a story, that's a narrative. That's my coping strategy that whatever language you wanna give it. But now I'm realizing that this coping skill no longer serves me.
[00:39:59] DR. WALTERS: Mm-hmm. It doesn't work anymore. Right? So now we're looking at, okay, do I wanna shift my schema to a healing schema, right. Or do I wanna continue to have a schema that perpetuates these negative interjects that may have come from culture, family, my fears. Mm-hmm. Right? And those fears, again, are grounded in my experience.
[00:40:27] DR. WALTERS: So we're not gonna blame ourselves for my coping skills. Right, because that's what I knew. That's how I knew, that's what I knew to do, to survive up until this point,
[00:40:42] DR. WALTERS: right? now that I'm here and I'm doing a, you know, a quick check and reflection, I'm realizing that this is not working.
[00:40:51] DR. WALTERS: So I can, I have choices. I can continue with that narrative, even though I know it's not serving me well. Right. Or I can check in with myself and like, okay, this doesn't serve me well. This part is okay, but this part isn't, so I'm gonna rewrite it. So think of, you know, we've all written stories in school.
[00:41:14] DR. WALTERS: You remember? You know, I, I remember when you get back from summer break, I dunno if they still do that. You used to have to always write about what you did on your summer vacation. Right? That was like the first essay that you had to write. And let's be honest, a lot of us exaggerated in those essays.
[00:41:31] DR. WALTERS: Right? But that was what I wrote. That's my narrative. And then I write a part that I don't like. What did we do if we wrote a part in our essay that we didn't like? What did we do?
[00:41:44] MATT: We wrote it small.
[00:41:46] DR. WALTERS: We wrote it small. Or if we didn't like it, what did we do? I don't know. We changed made. We erased it.
[00:41:55] MATT: Get rid of it.
[00:41:55] DR. WALTERS: We omitted it. We change it. Right? How many times have we written back then we were handwriting. Now it's on computer. We backspace now, right? Or we cut, right? But what we did was back then we have our pen pencils and we had the eraser at the top and we started erasing that part. And we changed the story to make it feel better.
[00:42:17] DR. WALTERS: And you know, we're showing off about our vacation and we, you know, because we want to feel good. Right? That's what I'm saying here. When we're shifting our narratives, that's exactly what we're doing, is we're going back and we're looking at the story I wrote, right? So Fawn, you know, in response to my, Hey, there is time.
[00:42:39] DR. WALTERS: Oh, but that means I'm not good enough. It means I'm blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Right? And you're writing that narrative. But when we catch it and we check it and we're like, well, no, there's no evidence to that. Guess what? No, I can use my eraser and erase that line and rewrite it to say, oh, I am good enough and here are reasons why.
[00:43:04] FAWN: Right. I just noticed something while you were describing this, Dr. C is, So as you're describing this, I'm going back to my yesterday where I was teaching the kids to swim, and there was a whole list of reasons why I felt bad about teaching them to swim because they, we, one, we paid for so many lessons and none of them took, none of these teachers taught my, our kids how to swim, right?
[00:43:30] FAWN: True time wasted, money wasted all this time. Now there's the shame that they're older and they don't know how to swim, right? There was all this negative, negative, negative, and then that was, as I was teaching them, I'm like, I'm not doing it well enough. Um, am I doing it right? I don't know, like berating myself while I'm teaching them.
[00:43:47] FAWN: But then as I was listening to you, Dr. C I was realizing that while in that moment if I say, yay, look at us. We are swimming. I just taught them how to swim. I just taught them how to float. I just taught them not to be afraid of the water. That gave me more energy to wanting to do it again. So, yes. And I think that the reason, and, and for me not being tired, because we are all working so much and we're all under so much pressure and the, some so many time constraints that we are emotionally, physically, spiritually tired, and I think mm-hmm.
[00:44:25] FAWN: If we do this, we feel a charge. We regain our energy. Am I right?
[00:44:31] DR. WALTERS: Yeah, absolutely. That's the perfect summary of it right there. Right. Because the idea is it takes so much energy, so much energy to be mean and hard on ourselves. Right. And so little, as soon as we make that shift, it's like, it's like a release.
[00:44:54] DR. WALTERS: Mm-hmm. It's like a release and let go. And that's why I said earlier, we cannot change what we have not accepted. We cannot change what we're not aware of, right? So me being aware that I'm holding onto this storyline, I'm holding onto this anger, frustration, resentment for something that I can't change.
[00:45:23] DR. WALTERS: They did a horrible job of teaching or not teaching in this situation my kids how to swim. Yes, we wasted money and time, but me holding onto that, me creating this story, me holding onto this, how's that serving me right now? Because it's not, right? But me then recognizing what can I do in this moment? And that's a part of the shift.
[00:45:50] DR. WALTERS: What is within my control? I know how to swim. I can teach my kids.
[00:45:57] DR. WALTERS: I'm saving money. I'm connecting with my kids. So we're bonding over this experience. It's a physical activity, which means my endorphin is gonna go up. It's a directed activity. My dopamine levels are gonna go up. We're enjoying ourselves. We got some oxytocin, we got some serotonin, we got all four neurotransmitters happening right here, winning.
[00:46:20] DR. WALTERS: So of course I'm gonna feel good. Yeah,
[00:46:23] FAWN: right. I can't wait to do it again.
[00:46:25] DR. WALTERS: Right. So that's the shift we're talking about is looking around and thinking about what are the things I can, whether it's physically change because remember I said when we're triggered, it affects our behaviors too, right? Mm-hmm.
[00:46:39] DR. WALTERS: So shifting our narrative can be behavioral. I'm gonna shift what I'm doing. It doesn't always have to be about the thoughts, right? Because again, it's a cycle. So if I shift what I do, my thoughts are gonna change. Hey, look at me. I got this. I'm a queen of a mom, right? That's now my storyline versus I'm such a horrible mom, right?
[00:47:11] DR. WALTERS: Mm-hmm. And I shift that storyline of me being a great mom by doing something, by deciding I'm going to teach my kids how to swim. So behaviorally, I shifted it by shifting my behavior, I shifted my narrative. And by shifting my narrative, I feel better because now I feel stronger, right? I feel more in the driver's seat.
[00:47:37] DR. WALTERS: My strength is here. And that's regardless of my past experience.
[00:47:44] FAWN: Mm-hmm.
[00:47:46] DR. WALTERS: Right? So regardless of what my interjects were as a child, regardless of my schema around being a failure, regardless of my schema around fear of abandonment, if I am angry or if I do all you know, don't do these things, fear of rejection, regardless of that, if I recognize that I can heal, so I can do my s scheme of healing, by challenging these narratives, by forcing them to find me evidence that I'm not good enough by forcing them to find evidence that I'm a failure, because it's not gonna be able to come up with any, the stuff that happened to me when I was six, I was six.
[00:48:33] DR. WALTERS: I was dependent on my paternal figures. The adults, the caregivers. I was six, but guess what? Now I'm in whatever age I am, I'm in my thirties, my forties, my fifties. So my 40, 50 year old, 30 year old self is gonna go back and, and say to that six year old, honey, you are beautiful. You got this. And yes, when you were six, what happened was not okay.
[00:49:04] DR. WALTERS: And no one should have talked to you that way, right? No one should have treated you that way. But you know what, I got you. That's changing my narrative. So guess what? My 30 year old self is gonna now say, right? It's gonna say, you know what, you are beautiful. You are loved, right? You are love and you are loved, right?
[00:49:30] FAWN: And this is something we can say to each other. Then, and that's something we can say to each other because we could have had a bad narrative with someone and come back and say, we can come back and say, that wasn't right. I love you. You're, you're perfect. You're beautiful.
[00:49:47] DR. WALTERS: Exactly.
[00:49:48] MATT: Thank you, honey.
[00:49:51] DR. WALTERS: Absolutely. Yeah. And it need to be responded to, right? And it definitely need to be responded to. But it True. But, but that's how, you know, we're talking about because, and you were right Fawn when you said, you know, all of these things are connected, right? Because if we're able to start changing our narratives, if we're able to catch and recognize our schemas, if we're able to peel back the layers of the onion and get to that core, what is my core belief, right?
[00:50:22] DR. WALTERS: Because that's what the schema part is, right? It's that core belief that I have about myself. It's that core belief I have about others. Others cannot be trusted. And here's the reason why I pay them the money. And they didn't do this, and my parents did this, and my coworkers did this, right? So if that, you know, is my core belief, right?
[00:50:42] DR. WALTERS: Or I'm not good enough, the world is not a safe place, right? So I need to peel back and find out what really is at that core. And once I find out what's at that core, then I can start shifting that again. I cannot change what I'm not aware of. Mm-hmm. Right? Right. I need to know what is it is at my core.
[00:51:02] DR. WALTERS: What is that belief? What is that narrative that I'm telling myself? The world is not safe. People are not to be trusted. I'm not good enough. Oh my God, God. And once I'm able to find that, guess what I can do? Then I can start looking for evidence to contradict that. And perhaps to shift our
[00:51:22] FAWN: narrative.
[00:51:22] DR. WALTERS: Shift our narrative. Doctor, shift my narrative.
[00:51:25] FAWN: Well, Doctor C, Dr. C, I, I know we're running out of time. I know you have to go, but. Does it ever
[00:51:31] DR. WALTERS: stop? Yeah.
[00:51:32] FAWN: Another 10 minutes. Does it ever stop? Because as I'm like, okay, I got it. I got the light bulb moment, I'm, but as you're talking, I'm like, oh, no. Because yes, I feel proud of myself that I, I did this thing, the, I'm like the narrative as you just said it, I'm like, oh, I have the narrative that I have to do everything myself.
[00:51:54] FAWN: That's a narrative. Perfect. That's like, oh my, it doesn't stop perfect. Like it does
[00:51:58] DR. WALTERS: not your,
[00:51:59] MATT: your story doesn't stop. No. Oh my
[00:52:02] DR. WALTERS: God. It does not. And the thing keep, so remember I said that, or thoughts? There's a couple things, right? Judgmental, negative. Catastrophic. Right. Not grounded in reality. And remember I said automatic, right?
[00:52:20] DR. WALTERS: So the moment you change one. Guess what? And now the one is gonna pop up. That's why it's work, right? So it's yes, but, right. Yes, I did do this, but Right. And we tend to do these distortions or cognitive distortions as we call them, right. And we are creating, so the moment I shift this narrative, the way the brain works, again, remember I said it doesn't like change.
[00:52:47] DR. WALTERS: Yeah. Right? So it's gonna try to find something to replace the one that you just took away.
[00:52:51] FAWN: Oh man.
[00:52:52] DR. WALTERS: Right? Right. So it's work. But here's, here's, here's the beautiful thing though. Here's the beautiful thing
[00:52:59] FAWN: I'm listening
[00:52:59] DR. WALTERS: is when we first start doing it, it's gonna take us this long, it's gonna take us, uh, I'll just make up a number.
[00:53:06] DR. WALTERS: It's gonna take us an hour just to shift, right? Mm-hmm. However, the more we do it and the more we practice it, right, it becomes shorter. So, Right. And the language shifts at this point. So instead of yes, but right, I could say yes, and it's true that this is happening. However, that does mean I'm stupid. Yes, I did in my presentation, I did transpose the numbers.
[00:53:38] DR. WALTERS: However, that doesn't mean I'm not good enough. The original language would read, oh my God, I just did this presentation to the C C E O, the cfo, all these big wigs. And I know they're walking away thinking, I'm just so dumb because I transpose this number. Oh my God. And I now, I remember when my, why my boss, you know, didn't give me a perfect score and my, my college professor and my... see? And that's why.
[00:54:07] DR. WALTERS: And that's why, and that's why. But if I shift my narrative and I'm saying, stop. What evidence do you have, right? Yes, it's true that you did transpose the numbers. However, your presentation for the rest was flawless, and here's the evidence of that. The CEO came up to you and like, oh my goodness, fawn. Oh my goodness, Matt.
[00:54:37] DR. WALTERS: That was one of the best presentations I've heard in a long time. They didn't even mention my transposed numbers, right? So that's what, when we talk about shifting the narrative, it's also an awareness that we can acknowledge that, yes, we did make a mistake, but that mistake doesn't make me, I'm having a bad moment, not a bad life, right?
[00:55:07] DR. WALTERS: This did happen, but it does not define who I am in finality. Dr. C.
[00:55:15] FAWN: Can we pause? Because you are serving the most fantastic, huge, beautiful feast, and I'm eating it all up. I'm, I'm being nourished by it, but I feel like I need to pause to digest. Perfect. Can we please meet again? Because everything, you're, it, it keeps going and I feel like, okay, I got it.
[00:55:37] FAWN: I got it. And then there's something else. Once you, you have another sentence. What a beautiful table of delicious meals that you offer Dr. C. It. You're really, you're so welcome. I am so grateful. I'm so grateful. I, I need to pause because I feel like I'm gonna explode.
[00:55:59] DR. WALTERS: And that's
[00:55:59] MATT: fine. I've had so many things I've wanted to say, but there's been like so many like truth, you know, she's throwing truth rocks.
[00:56:06] MATT: I
[00:56:06] FAWN: can't stop her. I know, I know.
[00:56:09] DR. WALTERS: Well here, here's, you know, we can always take each truth rock and just talk about it at a different time.
[00:56:15] FAWN: Did you make notes, Matt, about what you wanted to talk about? I absolutely did. Okay. Can we meet again Please? Soon.
[00:56:22] DR. WALTERS: We can definitely meet again and just let me know what truth rock we wanna, and we can do multiple truth rocks at the same time.
[00:56:31] DR. WALTERS: Okay. So let's go. Absolutely enjoy being here. Thank you guys again for having me on. And, you know, in, in, in terms of shifting our narratives, I mean, I don't think it's a, it can't be a one-time conversation, right? Not at all. Cause narratives or our narratives are, or realities, right? That's my reality.
[00:56:51] DR. WALTERS: That's your reality. That's Matt's reality. I don't have to necessarily agree with it. But I have to learn how to respect it. Mm-hmm. Right. I also have to learn how to respect my multiple realities. Right. And once I start respecting my multiple realities, then I can respect yours. Right? Yeah. And once I respect mine, I can start shifting mine so that I can have a healthier relationship with you.
[00:57:20] DR. WALTERS: Where you are in your reality. Right. And she
[00:57:25] MATT: just, the hits keep coming. I, oh,
[00:57:30] DR. WALTERS: there's more
[00:57:31] FAWN: dessert. Oh, yes. Another course. Another course to be served. Dr. C, you are brilliant. Yes. And I, we love you. You are, I love
[00:57:41] DR. WALTERS: you guys. You're magnificent. I
[00:57:42] MATT: really do. Can, can I offer up just a tiny morsel? Okay. What we focus on grows.
[00:57:49] MATT: So if we focus on things like every cloud has a silver lining and or when God closes a door, he opens a window and we focus there. As opposed to focusing other places when bad things happen. Because I heard from somebody wise that, you know, bad stuff happens. Suffering is a choice. I don't, I don't remember who said that, but that's your Dr. C!
[00:58:14] MATT: Oh really?
[00:58:21] DR. WALTERS: If we Absolutely bad things happen. If we focus
[00:58:24] MATT: on this is just a bad thing. Mm-hmm. And things will get better. Odds are, Hopefully things will
[00:58:33] FAWN: get better. Thank goodness this is all recorded. Indeed. Go back and rewind or whatever. What, what do we say now? We can't rewind, you know, go back and listen again and again and again.
[00:58:43] FAWN: Stream it
[00:58:43] DR. WALTERS: again. Stream and pause it. All that beautiful stuff. But no, this has been great. You know, um, I think our, the human brain is such a powerful and scary thing because of how much it does and, and can do and doesn't do. Right? It's so complicated. It's very complicated, and it's there to protect us, right?
[00:59:10] DR. WALTERS: Mm-hmm. And that's the thing. That's why we have to be kind. That's why compassion should be the thread through everything that we do. And that includes being compassionate with those, even those negative stories that we're telling ourselves because they're there for a reason. We just have to decide again if it's still serving us, and if it's not, then we need to shift it again with love.
[00:59:35] DR. WALTERS: Catch it. Check it compassionately, change it. Wow,
[00:59:43] FAWN: four Cs. Thank you. Everybody go to walters wellness group.com. It's in our show notes. If you go to our website, just type in Dr. Walters and all her information is there.
[00:59:59] FAWN: You do amazing work with one-on-one groups. You do retreats. I wanna
[01:00:04] DR. WALTERS: go to your retreats. I do retreats. Yes, I do. We just finished her one day restorative retreat, which was well attended and beautiful. I do retreats destination retreats in Costa Rica, in Jamaica, um, different places here in California, lake Tahoe, Napa.
[01:00:20] DR. WALTERS: and then the classes, you're welcome to do the classes there online. So wherever you are, please join us. And classes are on different things, including how to navigate traumatic experiences, how to manage life challenges, couples communications. Mm-hmm. So we have a variety of different things that we do offer, um, and I love.
[01:00:42] DR. WALTERS: Just being on the show. So thank you guys again for having me on. Be friendly and just, you know, I love this,
[01:00:53] FAWN: I love chatting with We love you, we love you, and what a, you're such a phenomenal, beautiful gift to the universe. I'm seriously so grateful. And we'll talk to you soon because you're, you're just now a family member.
[01:01:08] FAWN: So you're gonna be here all the time. We're just getting started. We're just getting started, guys. So thank you again. Everyone, please go to our friendly world podcast.com and walters wellness group.com. All the information is here. Show notes, again, our websites. Reach out to us, reach out to Dr. Walters. We love you all.
[01:01:28] FAWN: Thank you, and we'll talk to you in a few days. See you next time. Be well. Bye.
[01:01:32] DR. WALTERS: Thank you. Bye.
